The last few weeks have been a doozy emotionally and physically. I’m taking the day off to be with those three humans who mean more to me than all the lampshades and throw pillows in the world. That particular man-human in the navy shirt, above, is the best of all the humans in the world. He’s not perfect, no one is, but he is the best dad to our kids that I could ever imagine. I won the dad-lottery and it is a $479 billion proverbial check in our family’s emotional bank.
I had a really good conversation with one of my best friends, Robyn, last night that made me feel better about my parenting stress. I cried to her about how upset I was that my job, with all the shoot chaos really disrupts our kids’ lives. Even worse, I confessed, that I have a terrifying fear that my job is inadvertently spoiling our kids and turning them from being normal and grounded to eventually entitled and bratty. It’s been what brought on my breakdown last week and I can’t stop thinking about it. The castle! The new big boy room! They are living such a different life than how we were raised and I feel like we’re fighting a daily battle in which I’m unprepared.
She reminded me that Brian and I have been and will always be laser focused on what is best for our kids – OUR FAMILY. She’s right. Nothing is more important to us than them. NOTHING. It’s always nice when someone who has known you closely for 27 years reminds you that you are still a good person. I get glassy-eyed just reliving the conversation. But I would die without that man being so supportive of me and the chaos.
Brian, I am grateful for so much that you do for us. You set the coffee every night for a 6am brew. You pick up Charlie from school on your bike often which makes him feel special and proud. You do bath time with toddler-like energy. You know how to decipher Birdie’s 19 month old adorable language. You battle the monsters with imaginary swords far longer than I can muster. You can calm Charlie down in the middle of the night way faster than I can. You make Birdie laugh harder, Charlie engage longer and you hide vegetables in their meals with a secret spy technique that I haven’t the energy to execute. You are also an incredible actor and can make some extremely beautiful branded digital videos. You are talented and your potential in every category in life is endless.
While we aren’t perfect and we can somehow still have the same stupid arguments that we’ve had for the last 17 years, you, YOU, my love are my own personal fantasy of a father, and they are certainly going to have a happy ending because of you.
Happy Fathers day weekend, Brian. I love you so much. xx